Saturday, February 28, 2009

My Room (or "An excuse to show off my books")

I was moving a bunch of stuff in my room to creative new places and wanted an excuse to show off my books again. So here we go:

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Here we see my guitar amp, with a crate of games stacked atop, and a cutting board with my turntable/radio thing on top of that. Also, if you look closely you can see the string that holds up the radio antenna and on the other end of that a place where I hang things that really have no purpose being hung. If you look closely in the lower left hand corner you can see my printer/copier/"scanner" that is plugged in and functioning. I used it just the other day. Actually, I realized I needed to use it about 30 seconds after I moved it down there.

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My bed, a pirate flag, my "nightstand."

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Art supplies and some music stuff that currently have nowhere else to go.

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Books! And on the bottom shelf records.

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More Books! And a couple guitars. And a towel.

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Hey look, more books! And another guitar. And my subwoofer, playstation 2, leather jacket, and tube of tennis balls.

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Desk! And above it, my two posters. I'm not sure why I have oil lamps, but I see them leaving in the future. Not seen under desk: second smaller, crappier amp.

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My throne of comfort that is actually not all that comfortable.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Choice

While I enjoy writing my random nonsense and psychotic prose, I do, on occasion, feel the need to be a bit more coherent.

Watching several TED talks about creativity and genius have gotten me thinking about things. Specifically, predestination and choice.

Some say that we are destined to be something or somewhere, that whatever happens happens that way because that's how it's supposed to happen.

Others believe that nothing is set in stone. The way of the world is determined by what we do. No fate but what we make for ourselves.

What I've been thinking over is this: Theoretically, if you knew the position of every proton, neutron, and electron in the universe and the precise measurement of all the forces acting on them, you could predict where they would go and how they would react. And from this, extrapolate their positions and consequences into eternity.

To give you an idea of the applications of this, say you are studying a person. You need to know what he will do next. With the knowledge mentioned before, it would be a simple thing to predict how the electrons would flow through his brain and how the chemicals in his body would act, giving you the exact course of action he would take.

Here is where it gets tricky. Your knowledge of what he would do will change what you will do which trickles back down and changes what he does, starting the process over again and you're back to not knowing what he would do. Except that nothing has changed. All the knowledge of electrons and protons and neutrons still applies. You can still track it. It's still predetermined, but the future is still unknowable.

The fact that everything is changing as you learn it means that even if you know exactly what happened in the previous instant and all the things and paths and consequences that lead up to it, you cannot know what will happen next because you're knowledge of what happens next will change what happens next.

So is the future predetermined?

Where does choice fall into all this? Let's go back to the example. You've determined how the man you're studying will act, and you have formed a reaction. How was this reaction formed? You made a choice, yes? But if all the actions in the universe are predetermined by the movements of the atoms at the beginning of the universe then all you have accomplished is the illusion of choice. The action you've formed is merely the result of all the actions you've taken before, which were all determined in the same manner.

To make a choice, a real choice, one not predetermined, would mean a phenomena had taken place unheard of in modern science: something created from nothing. An unknown force unaffected by physics, barging into our universe and changing something according to no scientific law, throwing the whole mess into unpredictable chaos.

Is there such a thing as choice?

I believe there is. Let me try and explain why. It may make a bit more sense if you know that I'm a Christian.

It is commonly accepted that there are three parts to a human being: body, mind, and soul. The body being the physical component, the mind being the control mechanism, and the soul being sort of undefined. It's just there. It's important ... somehow.

I believe the soul is our gift from God, it's what sets us apart from plants and animals. It's what makes us human in the first place.

I think the soul is where choices are made. It is that force acting outside the realm of science to influence our universe and create random occurrences for better or worse.

If the body and mind are both physical components of the human being then they are both predictable entities of our universe. I believe the soul resides outside of this predictable physical space, but acts upon it through it's connection to the body and mind. The soul is our conciousness.

Based on what I've said above:

Premise A: Everything in the physical universe can be predicted based on the motion of electrons, protons, and neutrons.
Premise B: The human body and mind reside in the physical universe.
Conclusion: The actions and reactions of the human body and mind can be predicted.

That should make sense if you read the first half of this.

Now we make a few assumptions:

Premise A: Human beings have a soul.
Premise B: The soul does not reside in the physical universe.
Conclusion: Part of the human being is not predictable based on the motion of electrons, protons, and neutrons.

Nothing to radical there. If something is not part of something else it is not subject to that something else. Just as people in the United States are not subject to the laws of England. If this soul were to effect anything (which I believe it does (see the next part)) then it means that human beings as a whole are fundamentally unpredictable.

Finally:

Premise A: God exists.
Premise B: Choices are made with the soul
Premise C: God gave humans a soul.
Conclusion: Choice exists.

I said before I was a Christian, so this part should also make sense.

While this does not conclusively prove my point, it does lend credibilty to the idea. And the idea is this: For choice to exist, God has to exist. If God does not exist, then we have no choice and none of it matters anyway.

I think, from reading this, it is obvious that I believe human beings are capable of choice.

"The past is definite, the present uncertain, and the future unknowable."

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

See the cliff. See me run off cliff. See me forget parachute.

It's possible that I have been driven to this by an abundance of undirected energy. It's also possible that I think it's time to throw myself off a figurative cliff. Either way, the result is the same. A new blog post.

I have to much energy. In honor of fat Tuesday, I think I should have ice cream. I bought a new sketchbook. And some kneaded erasers.

Art students are always high because their supplies smell to good.

My parents and I have decided to win the lottery.

I went through the McDonald's drivethru to get direction to a walmart that we could see but not get to.

Stuffed animals ...

I thought I lost some money, but I just stuck it in a different pocket.

I just found my driver's license. How strange. Musical lobotomy.

I was playing around with my homepage earlier. That one I made. Now it has links.

Hats.

If I were ever to become a proffesional fighter, I would walk out to Indestructible by Disturbed. It is the perfect fight song. Speaking of which, I still need to see Fight Club. And/or read the book.

Black hats.

Speaking of black hats, one of the career paths I've been considering lately is penetration testing. Physical and Network Security. It's black hat hacking, but entirely legal and you get paid for it. All the fun of being a spy, with none of the danger of being shot (or almost none of the danger).

Have you ever sneezed and accidentally hit yourself in the face?

I found a nice pen in a bar in Florida, but it is out of ink and I haven't yet been able to find a suitable replacement cartrige. So I bought one of those Sharpie pens instead. Two actually, cause that's how they were packaged.

I probably shouldn't be sitting this close to speakers this loud.

I want to keep typing, but I am running out of things to say that don't require me to go and think. I am not in the mood to think. Or am I. I am thinking as I write, this ... punctuation oddly deforming itself to envelop my ever degenerating thought. process.

Train by 3 Doors Down

Now let's sit back and see what happens. Rather, I will will sit back, and watch you make things happen. I made this happen. Now your turn. ///

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Irons

It has been suggested that I update my blog.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

What're you looking at?

It's time I write again, but of what shall I write? My thoughts are rusty, my wits are slow, and my fingers are out of practice; but I am nonetheless determined (at least for the next few minutes) to pound out something for you read.

...

The dog is breathing on me.

Smashing start, no?

It's that time of year. The time of year when the temperature drops, the leaves change color, the birds fly south, and I get checks in the mail. Yes, just today I found an unexpected bundle of joy on top of my computer. Also today, I was handed a coupon for Barnes & Noble. It's like the dark side is calling and sending cookies all at the same time.

It could just be the unusually large amount of the over-the-counter drugs I've consumed today, but my head does not enjoy being being more than three feet from my ankles. Perhaps all those body-racking sneezes were just my heads way of insisting on a closer fraternity with my knees.

Anyways, this post comes to be only because every single on of my readers has told me one way or another that they do not like being left for months withouer updates. Here it is. Happy now? Good. Now leave my with my NyQuil.







...







You are still here. Why?






*sigh*

"My chest hurts when I move my arms like this. Ow. And this. Ow. And this and this and this. Ow."
"Then don't move your arms like that."
"But my chest hurts when I move them like this. Ow."



"Don't worry. That's just Tiger. He wanders."
"It's not him I'm concerned about. It's the fire balls that are following him."



Everytime I do the worm I smash my face into the floor. I don't think I'm doing it right.

Monday, July 21, 2008

I must be doing something right

1. Define your nightmare, the absolute worst that could happen if you did what you are considering?

I take a chance on a customer that falls through leaving me several thousand in debt. I file for bankruptcy, my bike gets reposessed. The repo man hits my cat. I end up having to wait tables at Steak and Shake.

2. What steps could you take to repair the damage or get things back on the up swing, even if temporarily?

Work to repair my credit, buy a used motorcycle. Sue the repo man for emotional distress. Start building another business on the side. I've tried and failed once, I can do it again. Change location, move to Florida, live with Grandma, get a job down there. Learn to sail and surf.

3. What are the outcomes or benefits, both temporary and permanent, of more probable scenarios?

I make some extra money on the side, eventually enough to quit my job. I meet new people, reduce my fears of appproaching people, and learn to sell what I want. Improved self-confidence. Gain respect. More free time to do what I want.

4. If you were fired from your job today, what would you do to get things under financial control?

Become as knowledgable as I can about AMSOIL while selling aggressively to anyone who will listen. Live off savings for as long as I can so I can focus on AMSOIL.

5. What are you putting off out of fear?

Selling to people I know.

6. What is it costing you - financially, emotionally, and physically - to postphone action?

Financially - extra income
Emotionally - self-confience, stress, worry, fear
Physically - stress

7. What are you waiting for?

The August price increase. I don't think it would be fair to sign up an account and then immediately raise the prices.


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All I can say is I must be doing something right if I managed to make my worst case scenario end with me in Florida taking surfing lessons.

Monday, June 09, 2008

What I'm trying to say is not here

Are we too cynical? Sitting there, picking apart the motives of others without knowing them, always assuming the worst. Or firmly stating that everything we do is the result of outside influence, that it couldn't possibly be our own thoughts but those of advertisers and mediamen.

Surely such a negative outlook on how we act can't be good for us. The ability to shun any responsibility for our own thoughts with the mere wave the hand and a cliche statement about environmental influences.

"It's not your own thought! It was planted there by something someone said, or you saw, or you read. You're just another means of advertising for the original thinker!" Bullshit, if we didn't listen, or see, or read we'd have no material for forming thoughts of our own. We'd be the mush the cynics say we are.

But maybe they are right. Maybe we're nothing more than fleshy billboards for the multi-billion dollar coporations that run our lives. Maybe this wasn't about cynicism.